Finding Love and Happiness After A Bitter Divorce
Commonly, people suffering in their love life are suffering physically somehow, whether it’s chronic pain, a broken heart (heart problems), breast or lung cancer. They long for that deep connection with someone that seems so elusive that they are in this physical distress. Worse is after divorce, especially a hideous one, picking up the shattered fragments to put together a loving connected life seems nearly impossible.
People come to me all the time to solve a physical malady but in essence really need to heal their love life. Let’s look at what happens when hopes and dreams die, the happily ever after fades into the distance, and your heart breaks into little fragments.
Yes, trust is gone, bitterness sets in, anger fills your life, you have a filter over your whole being that colors everything in that light. Life isn’t sweet. Your frequency has dropped, literally, and it sets you up for chronic illness or worse.
In that deep pain, many of you think to yourself that finding love again is going to help. Some are even love junkies, jumping from one relationship to another for that feel good hit that fades out all too quickly. You find that “all men/women are the same.” Is there a solution to this?
I’m not speaking from theory here, I lived every bit of what so many of my clients and people I speak to have gone through or going through.
Instead, it is a process that raises the frequency by eliminating those dark, low energy emotions directed toward the old relationship or your ex-partner.
Coming out the other side meant for me reframing what my time with my ex- meant, it also meant falling back in love with him, who he was for me and what he still is as the father of our children and grandfather of our grandchildren. In this we are united.
How does one go from one to the other?
The reframing is one thing, but there’s also a releasing of the ties that bind. When you carry a low energy emotion, like those I mentioned, anger, sorrow, disappointment, hate, resentment, you are still in a relationship with that person. You are unable to move forward. Inviting someone new into your life is virtually impossible because you are still deeply connected to your old partner.
Releasing those energetic ties, also known as cords, is the first step. It is not a one time process. It is much like tending a garden, you have to keep the weeds from growing big and taking over your garden. I wake up and cut cords every morning. As soon as I do, I feel lighter and brighter. It’s a great practice.
The second step energetically is to release the contracts and agreements. This means not only the formal dissolution of a marriage contract, but it is also the emotional dissolution of all other agreements, such as “I agree to let you blame me for things that I didn’t do.” Some of us have that self-punishing thing going, and we choose someone that needs to blame others.
And last, a release of any karma, what some people call the agreement we enter life with another spirit or being. It isn’t a system of punishment like some think and karma is voluntary, not dictated by some diffuse entity. You chose to take it on.
A simple reframe of the experience with someone good or bad, could help tremendously. If you ask yourself if you are better off having had that person in your life, even if it was to learn some difficult but important lessons, then your response is gratitude. Why?
Look at it this way, that person, your former partner, did not enter the relationship with you to make you miserable. He or she wanted it to work in the worst way. They wanted the same loving, close, intimate connection that you long for. There are lots of reasons it wasn’t achieved. It’s not necessary to go into that here.
The bottom line is, whatever terrible behavior they are doing or going through, it has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Stop taking it personally. Your bad feelings are not hurting anyone but you and blocking the way to having the best love ever.
Release the cords, contracts, agreements and karma to clear the way to being your best happiest self. Then you will be able to freely experience love again. It worked for me. It can work for you.
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Listen in as Gwen Lepard and I recount our experiences and how raising our frequencies changed our futures profoundly.
- “A lot of times what we do is we end up in tangling so much that we don't know where we stop and the other person starts.” [Anastasia]
- “We have so much more awareness that people are just more aware than they were in our parents’ generation.” [Gwen]
- “So anytime that you're hooked in emotionally, there needs to be a detachment process, because we are energetically connected with that person.” [Anastasia]
- “A lot of us will come into life, wanting to learn certain things.” [Anastasia]
- “Sometimes you bite off more than you can chew.” [Anastasia]
- “You don't change his or her karma, you only change your karma.” [Anastasia]
- “By cleaning up your side of the street, you clean up the whole street.” [Anastasia]
- “The biggest lesson was that that person brought you gifts, like incredible gifts.” [Anastasia]
- “These relationships were brought to us so we would become who we are meant to be.” [Anastasia]
- “Finding the love of your life means cleaning up all that old stuff because you need to raise your energy to be the person that you want to meet.” [Anastasia]
- “You don't want somebody to rescue you. You want to be the person you want to meet.” [Anastasia]
- The heart emanates stronger than anything else in our body, and these emptions and plots are transmitted to people around us.
- Codependent entanglement is unhealthy, and sometimes it is because we grew up in dysfunctional environments.
- So when you have an emotional reaction, what you're actually doing is you're sending a line of energy to that person.
- If you say, “I disagree to have this anymore”, than it releases you from that from that energy, so and it releases them because there's no longer a connection or an energy exchange.
- When you're being held down with all of those old, basically low energy emotions, your frequency is, is stuck down there, you're stuck in that pain, and all you'll attract is more pain.
- There are “no happily ever after’s”, there is a coming together of people.
- When you start mixing frequencies, or more and more frequencies together, what happens is that the amplitude of all the frequencies starts to die down and your energy feels completely depleted.
[2:09] Failed Marriages of Dr. Anastasia
[4:06] Why We Attract the Wrong People
[8:02] Codependent Entanglement
[10:32] Maintaining a Healthy Relationship
[17:59] What Happens to the Other Person
[21:11] Does Energy Cleaning Make the Person Go Away?
[26:30] Biggest Obstacles
[29:41] Clearing Clients for the 2nd Time
[32:30] Biggest Lesson
[37:33] What Anastasia Offers
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